So Now I am a Biopsy Vet

Another verrrrrry steep learning curve. Hmmmm, where to start. Maybe the night before. I became more and more weird and pretty darned wired, not to be confused with weird–although some characteristics are the same. MEGA. I just had to have some prosecco and it was tasty; it didn’t hurt and it didn’t help. And I gained a pound. Bad, bad alcohol.

I guess I only got about 4.5 hours of sleep which may have exacerbated my anxiety. I got up early enough to shower and of course, put on a good bit of make up. I think it is important to make a connection with your caregivers. I sure did that. So I got there at 7:45 and Susan L was there within minutes. I felt so jumpy. I mean it. I could have exploded easily I was so twitchy, albeit well dressed and groomed! Thank God she was there…just the proper amount of distraction from the anxiety. She doesn’t talk much but when she does it is the RIGHT talk. IF Len had been there I would have to have killed him. He would be trying too hard and in the wrong direction. I am still very pleased he is asking for advice. Steph says, he may not be a fast learner but he is a learner unlike most men. True. I love that about him. OKKKKKKKKKKK, back to the tale.

So Susan L is distracting me appropriately and I introduce her to the technician who summoned me as the official listener. I am sitting there in the regulation blue, wrap around gown with S when the young resident comes in and introduces himself….a young Dr. Kildare type…very nice and he spoke slowly! That I loved. He asked how I was and I blurted out, “I am a wreck. I am verrrrrrry nervous.” Cool guy response, “That is the way every one who comes here feels.” Although I liked that response I had about a 2 minute Projectile Tear episode. Thank God it didn’t involve hiccups and drool. I think I looked really composed (make up worries) but those pesky tears just shot straight out. Right about then I started to deescalate…and I gradually pulled it off and well, pretty damned well. Once I can feel like I am in control (sorta) of the social quality conditions, I can pretty much deal with things. So I made friends with everyone. Susan asked the right questions and got answers to be related later in this entry. They wouldn’t let her stay for the procedure and really I think I liked that too. I mean I say she is unconditionally a friend but if I screamed, thrashed about, or fainted….? Ultrasound biopsy equipment.jpg

So the procedure. It did not hurt…it sounded like an electric stapler but the Dr. always told me when to expect it. Felt like some one poking me with their finger. Leslie, very sweet and likable ultrasound technician and I had bonded…she had to reallly hunt for the area…good sign. Staff Dr. came in to coach and mentor young Dr. Kildare….his name was Dr. Phil….I determined where everyone went to college–yea TAMU! Then proceeded to talk about my recent archery and handgun experience so they would know not to mess with me. This lead to Dr. P saying he & his wife didn’t really know how to handle their young son’s interest in handguns. So being who I am, I explained that although I am ‘barren’, I am an experienced Child Development teacher and offered sage advice and parenting tips. He liked it….if nothing else my prattle beat having a patient hyper ventilate.

The two doctors went out to see that they had what they wanted; came back in for another little bit, showed me the bottle with my name on it (protocol I suspect) then off they went. Leslie took away some of the gel and then we went out the door…all smiles and laughter…Susan surmised I had overcome the shakes. Then Leslie did another mammogram so to be sure the little marker was in place. Jerry the Mammogram nurse came out and said they are still trying to see if Dr. Lair….will fit me in June 27 instead of waiting until July 11.

I got dressed. Susan went on to Bible study and I went and got my oil changed, Sam’s Club, then met Susan and Bill, Bob and Becky, and Mary Lou for lunch. By then I was enjoying a huge, über euphoric state. It was awesome…real chemical. When I got home I went straight to bed with a bag of frozen soup vegetables on my breast and slept for two blissful hours.

Bottom line: When I left the follow-up mammogram on Monday, I was convinced they thought it was definitely cancer. Now after the biopsy CONVERSATION with resident, staff physician and ultrasound tech, Susan and I believe that they don’t know for certain ….but these images, architectural distortions, often are or develop into cancer……my ‘distortion’ is small….My boobs are very dense in general. I now know that they are doing the biopsy before surgery to determine just how much of the breast tissue to remove during the subsequent surgery. I will know Monday or Tuesday if the biopsy is positive they will take a wide margin out when they do the .surgery; if it is negative they will take less.

So why the ‘very scary’ description? Don’t know. The biopsy people used words like very suspicious. One way or the other–they got my attention. The latest crew indicated that Mexico trip is not necessarily out. If I have one deflated breast, I wonder if I will still be popular with old men?

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One Response to “So Now I am a Biopsy Vet”

  1. nancy baumann thurmond Says:

    O my,what a traumatic experience for you. I am not as articulate as you are, but I will only think good thoughts and pray for you! Love, nancy

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